Wednesday, 4 June 2008

No never no more.

La Fille's bedtime routine becomes increasingly drawn out as she becomes adept at the art of parent manipulation. Her technique is rudimentary but effective; she repeats a request in the same voice over and over until I or the Frenchman crack. I know we shouldn't give in and it is not good parenting but by evening we are clean out of fight. It is as I imagine Chinese water torture; in fact I'm increasingly convinced the verbal drip drip drip of "can I have another story, can I have another story" repeated over a length of time would drive anyone to a full and frank confession, if not raving mad, and save water resources at the same time. Perhaps I should hire out La Fille to repressive regimes.

However many books I read the happily ever after is never quite the end of the story. I then have to do "What we did today", a précis of the day's activities, then sing exactly eight nursery rhymes in a precise order. I've done this since she was a baby - though then it was just three rhymes - as I thought it would be another way of insinuating English into her life. Now it's like a 1970s game show challenge as I try to sing Lavender's Blue, Twinkle Twinkle, Three Blind Mice, Rock-a-Bye-Baby, See Saw, The Grand Old Duke of York, Pussy Cat, Pussy Cat, and Pat-a-Cake in the shortest possible time while still enunciating the words. Any day now I expect Brucie to appear and shout: "Didn't she do well?"

The other night I thought I'd vary the routine. I threw in What Shall We Do With a Drunken Sailor and Wild Rover. I warbled with a cod Irish accent:

I've been a wild rover for many's the year
I've spent all me money on whiskey and beer,
But now I'm returning with gold in great store
And I never will play the wild rover no more.
And it's no nay never,
No nay never no more
Will I play the wild rover,
No never no more.


I felt Brucie would have been impressed. La Fille was not; a little voice piped up from underneath the bedcovers: "Mama, STOP making that noise." Ungrateful wretch.

5 comments:

Nicol said...

I understand about the bedtime routine. I try to keep it the same for my dd but then I get bored too. I recently typed up hundreds of children's song to liven things up. After first reading this post last night, I have had Lavendars Blue stuck in my head. I never heard this song until I enrolled my dd into a Kindermusik class.

girl with the mask said...

So THAT is what that sonds was at about 8pm last night, I heard about that on the news!

Maggie May said...

We have similar routine hear with the Grandchildren though its not generally me who has to do it!

Nora said...

When your own child is all grown up and you have no little children of your own, you just don't believe what parents will put up with. It is absolutely amazing.

Parisgirl said...

Nicol, I used to like it until I had to sing it every night!
GWTM, you can laugh now singleton but you wait...!
Maggie May and Nora, I know, I know. Her grandmother's routine begins and ends with This Old Man and you don't want to hear that too many times!